72% of Canadian guys surveyed have Junkface† Ipsos Reid 2014
Province with the highest rate of Junkface†:
Alberta: 86% Ipsos Reid 2014
Current Junkface threat level:
Other things that shouldn't come into contact with your junk:
by facial hair
- Mutton Chops
- Soul Patch
Historical figures we can reasonably assume had Junkface:
- Genghis Khan
- Michelangelo's David
- King Arthur
- Abe Lincoln
Fictional characters we can reasonably assume had Junkface:
- Friar Tuck
- The Phantom of the Opera
38% of women would consider not marrying a guy with Junkface† Ipsos Reid 2014
Sports where you’ll encounter Junkface:
Bounty hunters and Junkface:
The Five Stages of Junkface:
What is Junkface?Junkface is what you get when you wash your face and junk with the same thing.
How do I know if I have Junkface?People who ask themselves that question usually have Junkface.
Is Junkface hereditary?Technically, no. But your dad may have it. His dad probably had it. And his dad definitely had it.
I think I got it from a park bench. Is that possible?No. You only get Junkface when you use the same bar of soap to clean your junk and your face. Also, stay away from park benches.
How do I tell a loved one they have Junkface?Loved one, you have Junkface.
Is there a support group for people with Junkface?No. There’s NEUTROGENA® MEN® Face Wash for people with Junkface.
My doctor says Junkface isn’t real. What gives?Your doctor probably doesn’t think the Loch Ness Monster exists either. Do you believe him?
If you're driving remember to always check your blind spots. If you're walking remember one foot in front of the other.
Specially designed for a man’s face Invigorating Face Wash is a foaming gel cleanser with a cooling lather that works down to your dirtiest pores and leaves your skin looking great. In short, it works. In slightly longer, it works great and it’s a great way to end Junkface.
Continuing with the theme of greatness, all of these products are also a great way to be great to your face. Also, we’re pretty great at using the word great repeatedly. NEUTROGENA® MEN®. Made for Your Face.
“I had a case of full-blown Junkface. It’s a miracle I’m still here today.”
“My dad taught me how to ride a bike. I taught my dad how to stop Junkface. You owe me dad.”
“Junkface almost ruined my marriage and I wasn’t even engaged yet.”
*The survivors portrayed above are fictional representations of survivors. Having said that, we still feel their pain.